When Every Day Appears to be a Bad Day (Part 1)
As a mother of 3 (4, 2.5 and 1 years young) active little mites, I’ve certainly been witness to a fair share of interesting behaviours! One of my greatest challenges is maintaining true consistency when approaching behaviour that naturally stirs frustration, anger & out bursts.
Work demands an extortive amount of my time & despite the numerous external factors that effect my mood, energy levels & patience, consistency needs to maintain its roots. It has to be grounded & concrete. That’s the theory anyway!
Testing behaviour will happen – that’s a given! Perhaps one way to front run a potential (and probable) reactive out burst may be to try and understand/ identify why our child is throwing fist to floor and creating a stampede sensation…
Let's Explore a Few Possible Reasons:
- Change – yes … change effects children too! Both big & small, the slightest alteration to their environment can be unsettling & result in ‘irrational’ behaviour
- Your emotions – children are incredibly perceptive & they have the ability to detect unhappiness on the spot. Be mindful of your own emotions & how you reflect your feelings
- Previous measures – choose carefully! We all bribe, plead & woo our kids to encourage good behaviour especially when we are in public. Ever used sweets as a tool to get your way? Then don’t be surprised if they scream for sweets when out & about
- Could you accidentally be encouraging difficult behaviour? – could they be trying to get our attention (even bad attention)? Perhaps trying to give them more time/ attention when they are behaving well and less time when they are being difficult could help turn events?
- Try tally the times – is there a pattern to your child’s difficult behaviour? Could they be tired, hungry, over excited, frustrated or bored?
Let’s recap … tantrums will happen … They are a form of expression & until our kids have the right skills to channel their emotions in a constructive manner, this is what we will be faced with.
By taking a moment to understand/ identify the cause/ catalyst for the ”jiggle” may help us better resolve the situation … and in turn, setting an example of how one applies appropriate coping skills.
Again … That is the theory :)
At the risk of stating the obvious, all children & parents are different … I’d love to hear your views & coping mechanisms.
Lastly, never underestimate a glass of wine at the end of a long day !! ;)
Till next week ….